Get ready for the next big thing in social media …
Barker is the hottest new social platform in town with a Twitter-like service that has the marketing promise of “delivering messages with extra bite”. It is seeing exponential growth around the world since it launched only a few months ago.
Randy Outlander, Barker’s CEO, commented: “Let’s get real. What’s the point of sitting like lovebirds on a telegraph wire tweeting gently to each other, when there are real nasty views that need to be delivered?
“We want to create an environment where trolls, bullies, bigots and criminals can freely interact with the general public in a way that enhances our bottom line. The problem with social media is that every-one is sooo polite, too many “plz”, “tx” and “<3”.
“And who has got time for 140 characters? If you can’t bark an insult in 99 characters, then you are simply not angry enough. Or perhaps you might be seeing both sides of the argument. Either way you are just being f…ing DUMB.” Randy said with feeling.
“A unique innovation at Barker is that we carry audio with all our messages, so your personal insults can actually be heard and not just read. And here’s one of our greatest features: the sender controls the volume! This allows the receiver (or “target” in Barker speak) to have the full emotional experience intended by the sender.”
Other features of the Barker message service are:
- all barks defaulted to CAPITALS for ease of use
- obscene and banned words do not decrement the character count so you can use as many as you like
- look-up feature to identify targets and source hard-to-find personal data
- no ability for targets to block or unfollow.
“We are all super-excited about this fabulous technology – it will be awesomely great!” Randy concluded.
Over at Ooglebook, they profess not to be worried about this aggressive upstart. A spokesperson said: “we are confident that we can retain all our users. We believe that our unique combination of images, videos and long posts enables all users to gain a fuller emotional experience and also allow the message to be shared amongst a full friendship group for greater impact. No-one else can match that”.
Social Media analyst, Rick Digit, aired some skepticism about the value of Barker’s new communication platform. “The market is already saturated”, he commented “and while the current players talk about limiting these types of unpleasant messages, it really is easy picking for trolls. So what’s new?”
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